Latest Plan to Save the Mets: The "127 Hours" Theory

The New York Post's Joel Sherman has found an American League executive who believes that Met ownership should cut off their arm to spite the fans. Sherman, following up on his interviews with officials who believe the Mets should do a fire sale, quotes an exec who suggests the Wilpons could overcome reluctance to get rid of all their best players by drawing inspiration from a recent movie:

He called it his "127 Hours" theory. This executive said, "Before you kill yourself, why not cut off your arm and see if that helps you survive? No one wants to do that. But you want to die less. I have to assume the Wilpons do not want to (bleep) off their fans more, but why not take whatever opportunities you have to hold the team? I bet the banks would like it."

Let's review. You're suggesting a strategy that you admit up front will infuriate an already disenchanted fan base. And you're using an analogy that comes across as a plan to do permanent damage to the franchise. If you sell off all your good players, it's supposed to be because you eventually expect to end up with other good players. But if you cut off your arm, it doesn't eventually grow back.

You can still do plenty of things with one arm, even play baseball, as Pete Gray did for the St. Louis Browns in 1945. Jim Abbott, who was born without a right hand, pitched in the major leagues for a decade. Abbott even tossed a no-hitter for theYankees in 1993. (Yes, Squawker Lisa, I realize that means that the Yankees have more no-hitters from pitchers with one hand than the Mets do from pitchers who have both hands.) But Abbott and Gray are heroic figures who overcame adversity that was no fault of their own. There's nothing heroic about the Mets' financial mess.

Then again, once the Mets adopt the "127 Hours" theory, they could go on to the "300" theory: A Spartan roster battles bravely against overwhelming odds - before being completely wiped out.

The kind of analogy I'd like to see the Mets use would be something like a "Spider-Man" theory, in which an unfortunate situation (getting bitten by a radioactive spider) results in acquiring superpowers.

But even if Mets ownership adopted a "Spider-Man" strategy, they would stumble over the part about how "with great power comes great responsibility."

Besides, the Mets have spent the last couple of years adopting a "Spider-Man Musical" strategy, in which you spend tens of millions of dollars for an injury-riddled disaster.

And selling off all your good players and hoping people will still come to the ballpark would be as if "Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark" tried to lower its operating costs by dropping the special effects and the U2 music.

Why Bud Selig Needs to Stop Charlie Sheen -- Now

I've been squawking a lot this week on Facebook about the whole Charlie Sheen drama. But now I am moving my gripes about Sheen to Subway Squawkers, because he has gone too far -- wearing a New York Yankees shirt while spewing bile in one of his crazy videos. Enough! When is somebody going to stop the madness already?

We know that MLB Advanced Media will crack down on fans like those who ran the "Cubscast" podcast for using a team's name, or try to shut down pretty much anything they don't like that a fan writes online. Maybe MLB should be concerned that Sheen, who has been on TV about a hundred times over the past 10 days, is wearing baseball gear in most of his bizarre rants. I've seen him wearing Cleveland Indians and San Francisco Giants hats, which is one thing, but when he sullies the interlocking NY by wearing it, I have had it! C'mon, Bud Selig, ban him from wearing MLB gear. Now! 

I'm not exactly a fan of Sheen these days, and the drug abuse is the least of it. Heck, I watch "Intervention" every week, and there are a lot of sympathetic addicts on the show that I root for to get clean. But whether he is sober or not, Sheen is just too hateful and arrogant to be sympathetic. The thing is, his career was based on being a likeable partier. But he's shown himself to be extremely unlikeable these days.

And I think it's disgusting the way the media whitewashes the fact that he has a long track record of beating up women. Sorry, Piers Morgan, it doesn't make Sheen a "rock star" that he reportedly threatened to cut off his ex-wife's head, put it in a box, and mail it to her mother. Not to mention that Sheen had custody of his kids during some of his meltdowns this week, until the state finally stepped in. And what was NBC and ABC thinking in showing those poor young kids on TV?

And how about all of Sheen's "Apocalypse Now" references, comparing himself to Colonel Kurtz? You may remember that Kurtz, played by Marlon Brando, was killed by Martin Sheen, Charlie's father, in the film. What is Sheen saying here? That he wants his father to put him out of his misery? It's all too much. I haven't heard so many weird ramblings since I read Dutch Schultz's deathbed speech!

At any rate, if MLB can be so diligent at protecting its image, and its logos, can't they stop Sheen from wearing baseball attire? Who wants to see baseball represented by such a vile human being?

You know who else needs to gripe? The tigers of the world. It's not enough that they're being slaughtered, but Sheen sez he has tiger blood! What did they do to deserve such an insult?

I will be on Sully Baseball's "Seamheads" radio show tonight

If you want to hear me squawk about the Yankees, Mets, and maybe even a little Charlie Sheen talk thrown in, check me out on the Seamheads podcast tonight at 10 p.m. eastern. I will be talking baseball with my good friend Sully Baseball, on his "Sully Baseball Show." Check it out on your computer by clicking this link.

Fire Sale for the Mets?

The Post's Joel Sherman suggests that the Wilpons may have to resort to "an all-out fire sale" if they want to keep the Mets. But such an idea is not only repugnant, but wouldn't even work.

Sherman quotes unnamed executives who tout such a plan:

Two executives heavily involved in major league finances said it would be wise for the Mets to reduce payroll dramatically; even to, say, the $70 million range as soon as the 2012 season. This hardly would solve all of the Wilpons’ financial problems because they carry hundreds of millions of dollars in debt before even learning their ultimate fate in the Madoff debacle.

But the two executives felt even a stripped-down version of the Mets still would draw no worse than two million spectators to Citi Field.

In 2008, the Mets' home attendance at Shea Stadium was 4,042,047. In 2009, that figure dropped by 900,000 to 3,154,270 at the new Citi Field, which was a lot smaller. With more expensive ticket prices, the Mets probably came out ahead.

But in 2010, attendance fell to 2,559,738. The Mets were in the second year of a new ballpark that just about everyone praises. The Mets had a competitive team for the first half of the year that was eight games over .500 at the All-Star break. And still their attendance dropped by 600,000.

With a brand-new ballpark and a high payroll, the Mets have lost 1.5 million paying customers in two years. Is that a business plan - to try to hold the losses to another half a million?

These days, it's not even a big deal to draw two million. 21 of the 30 clubs did so last year. Even the Pirates, who haven't had a winning season since 1992, drew 1.6 million.

But you know how the Pirates managed to convince that many people to watch the team go for its record 18th straight losing season? Let's say you want to go to a Pirate game and you'd like to sit behind the dugout. You know how much that will cost you?

Thirty-five dollars.

Granted, that's if you buy your dugout seats in advance. If you wait to buy them until the day of the game, they will set you back $40.

The Mets already cut ticket prices going into this season, and reports are it isn't doing any good. That fancy new ballpark was built under the assumption that not only would it be filled, but filled with people paying premium prices. So in the long run, propping up attendance by slashing ticket prices isn't likely to impress bankers all that much.

Not to mention what destroying your product will do to your other streams of revenue. People buy jerseys and shirts of your stars, not the cheaper replacements. And good luck maintaining viewership on SNY. At least the announcers will be able to get to know the remaining viewers personally when they appear on "Ask the Booth." Once the games become meaningless, they can start "Ask the Booth" in the third inning so everyone can get a turn.

The Mets also have something the Pirates don't - the Yankees on TV every night. And playing 81 home games a few miles away, plus more in the postseason. Most Met fans won't desert to the enemy. But their kids might have an odd preference for the packed house in the middle of a pennant race. Even Shake Shack is less of a lure now that they have several new locations.

Sherman goes on to quote an executive who says that "smart fans" will realize that the Mets need to rebuild. But most Met fans have already been patient throughout this offseason when the team spent almost no money. "Smart fans" will realize that, even if they went along with a rebuilding plan, it only works if the team drafts over slot and invests in international free agents. And at some point, you'll have to pay to keep those players, or you'll end up like Tampa, where the fans realize that every good player is destined to leave.

The odds of fans supporting the destruction of the team just to preserve the current ownership is about the same as Hank Steinbrenner having a smile on his face if he has to sign over a revenue-sharing check to Fred Wilpon.

Squawker Media Alert: I will be on the radio at 10 a.m. today

Greetings. I'm going to be squawking baseball with Mike Lindsley of Syracuse's The Score 1260 at 10 a.m. today. If you are in the Syracuse area, you can listen to me on 1260 AM on the radio. If not, check out the station's web site and listen to me there. Thanks!

Hank Aaron Questions A-Rod's focus, And I Question Hank Aaron's Logic

I wrote something for The Faster Times the other day criticizing Hank Aaron for his recent comments about Alex Rodriguez criticizing A-Rod's supposed lack of focus. Aaron complained because A-Rod said he had a "great winter" (actually, he said he had a "good winter") and said that Rodriguez should always have a good winter. Never mind that back in Aaron's day, ballplayers -- Hammering Hank included -- worked at jobs during the offseason, instead of on their physiques, and used spring training to get into shape. Aaron is entitled to his own opinion. He's not entitled to his own facts!

Anyhow, check out my article, if you haven't done so already. Thanks!

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Also, in other news, I won a $50 gift certificate from FansEdge.com, thanks to a contest run by Lady Loves Pinstripes. How cool is that? Thanks, Kate, for running the contest!

Hard Knocks: New York Mets

SNY borrows a page from HBO with this behind-the-scenes look at the Mets' preseason.
Highlights include:

Glamorous free-agent acquisitions
Are you the Chris who's had serious shoulder problems or the Chris who's had Tommy John surgery twice?

Heartbreaking scenes of players getting cut
Misch, Emaus, if only you had big contracts like Perez and Castillo.

Modern training camp methods
A special visit to Francisco Rodriguez' anger management class.

Controversial holdouts
Season-ticket holders, where did you go?

Inspirational speeches
Now let's go get a goddamn loan!

Thanks to Squawker Lisa for coming up with the idea.